Group Forums >> Mother's & Father's of Teenagers >> Talking about sex
Talking about sex
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Posted 3 months ago I have a TWEEN....my daughter is 12, soon to be 13. She's a wonderful young lady. I am very blessed that she is caring, compassionate, respectful, loving and considerate. I never imagined myself the mother of a teenager, but here I am. Since she was able to understand spoken words I have been talking with her about her body, whats appropriate and what's not. As she gets older, our discussions regarding sex are becoming more involved. I'm very open and honest with her. I even opened my anatomy book to show her how her body looks inside and out and explained how things work. I'm curious to know how other mothers and fathers handle this topic....how much info is too much? Or is it possible to arm our kids with too much info? |
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| Posted 2 months ago I don't believe that we can evern arm our children with too much information. I also have a tween and another just about the there, I also have to younger ones that i allow to sit in on our conversations. I think that honesty is the best policy and believe you me she will let you know when too much is too much. I have even gone as far as taking the l&D video out of my maternity book and let my kids watch a vaginal and section delivery. I feel that we need to give our chidlren the tools to allow them to make well informed decisions should they need to. As you know you that teen pregnancy is on such a rise that our children need to be prepared to make those decisions as we will not be around all the time to do that. With that being said what we have taught them will be..... Of course these are mine and my husbands beliefs but i want you to know i believe what you are doing is great and she will let you know when enough information is enough and probe for more if she wants more. They are pretty amazing in that way. Many kids in her class (my daughter as she has told me) are experimenting with many different things sexually and she has been taught a lot that she knows that she doesn't want to do those things becuase of the risks,,,,,, Hope that this helps you Jessie |
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| Posted 2 months ago Tell them whatever they ask you. If you do not someone else will and it may be the wrong information. Use all the nursing book you have. I have always been honest with my children about everything. They come and talk to me about everything. When my 16 y.o son had sex he came to me and told me. "Mom I had sex and I need to tell you." "I should have waited but I didn't " "I wanted you to know because you tell me everything." |
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| Posted 2 months ago My daughter and I have always been able to talk about anything and everything. There are some great books available that get real clinical about sex and STDs. It is worth it to open the door to conversation. My daughter tells me now how thankful she is that we were able to talk. The boys that hung around thought I was psycho and would kill them, LOL. I didn't do anything to dispel that either. |
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| Posted 2 months ago I think all children should be taught on this subject as soon as they start asking questions...and that proper body parts be named..Im not the parent who is going to name things by cartoon names....UGH..
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| Posted 2 months ago I also have a tween. I recently went to several different online sites (sorry didn't write them down) to educate my daughter about why she should wait and if she doesn't then this is why you use protection. I believe that you cannot give them too much information. I call her into a room alone and I ask her abaout what is going on at school. Sometimes she tells me and sometimes she doesn't. She was telling me when we looked at the information online that kids at her school were saying "if you are not having sex by the time you are 13 or 14 then you are weird" and "if you don't have sex by the time you are 16 you never will". So I told her how untrue that was. I also told her that oral sex is still sex, and the same goes for anal. There are a lot of kids out there that believe they are "virgins" because they have never had vaginal intercourse. Well I told her how wrong that statement was. I feel like it is my responsiblity to make sure she knows these things from me and not from her friends. I encourage her to talk to me about things I haven't talked about that they bring up at school. She ask me one time why she needed to know all this stuff now, and my reply was, "You are in middle school now and I want you to know the facts and the truth about this stuff. A lot of the kids are going to be talking about these things and some of what they tell you is not going to be true. Besides there was a girl in your school that was pregnant last year. You need to know." |
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| Posted 2 months ago Tweens grow up! My tweens turned into a 23 yr old and 25 yr old. I dont envy you all, good luck! I think my kids turned out pretty well. Being honest and not looking terrified is about the only thing I could add to what you all have posted. I said this because a couple of years ago, my daughter told me when I was speaking to her about sex, I had the 'deer in the headlight look' and that conversation took place over a decade ago.......I think we had ' our talk' when she was about 11ish, and she's the 23 yr old.........she said after I would leave the room, she would point and giggle at me. I am now gonna go do some goofy dance because my tweens grew up! We only have one heart, take care of it! Angie |
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| Posted about 1 month ago Arm Away! Any and all info is good. The more a childe knows about how their body works, the better off I think. They need to know exactly how they can get pregnant. It is then, THEIR choice to participate in sex or not. I only hope and pray my two girls, now 11 and 12, wait for sex until they are married. My husband and I are going to give our daughters promise bracelets next year when we renew our vows. These pearl bracelets will remind our girls to WAIT until marriage for sex. It is worth it! A good man loves God and lives well....but
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| Posted about 1 month ago All teens, girls and boys need to know the facts about their bodies. I think teen boys also need to know and understand how a girls body works and visa versa. The more knowledge these days the better. I work for an OB/GYN and we have so so many young teens pregnant. I think positive reinforcement and open conversation works, especially with all the peer pressure and with all the poor role models there seems to be out there for our youth today. It is ultimately up to the teen whether they chose to have sex or not. All you can do as a parent is be there and allow them to be open if they chose to do so. I as a step-parent know the good morals my step-daughters have..I am here for them if they want to talk about it or have questions. Taylor's Wife, Navy Wife Proud and Strong!
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| Posted about 1 month ago It sounds like we have some good parents here on Nursing Link! A good man loves God and lives well....but
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| Posted about 1 month ago I wish my mother had talked to me about sex....she didn't. Her only advice was "DON'T DO IT!". Luckily I didn't fall for any of the hokie doke that was going on in my school back in the 80's! Boy have things changed. When I was 13, I looked like a 13 year old, not a 23 year old like a lot of today's young ladies. It's nice to know so many parents are trying to teach their children to have respect for themselves. I truly hope at the end of the day my girls will have the self esteem and respect they need in order to be strong and say no to the pressures of teenage sex. I also used my medic book to show them pics of STD's, and we read about each one...the symptoms and how it's contracted. They were so disgusted, and I was glad!!!! |
